Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 22, 2012 0:31:44 GMT -5
Was Dane...cuddling him? Moriel felt a small quiver of confusion and, yes, pleasure. Maybe it had just been so long since he'd had proper physical contact? But, no, Chase and him had plenty of that (though as far as the sexual aspect had gone, he'd rather they hadn't). He had been aware and highly cautious that his intentions here might become less than altruistic. Dane needed space right now, gentle guidance and security, not leering from an ancient recluse that was supposed to give him that. Still, he didn't push him away. Couldn't. His eyes stayed straight ahead, though, staring at the wall in front of them.
"I'm a bit biased, I guess," he admitted. "I'm rather quick to defend it because, well, I really did care about the wives I was arranged with. Chiklah was as well. These days, I'm of your opinion. It's not the way to go about things. Love is worth more than that." His gaze traveled down to the floor. With the sun streaming in the window behind them, casting a shadow of them on the floor. Dane was completely encased by his wings, not even visible in their silhouette. Without even thinking, his wing curled forward, the tips of his feathers brushing Dane's knee.
"I think that's a good thing to be sure of," he decided aloud. A smile spread across his lips. "I want that, too."
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 22, 2012 0:57:39 GMT -5
Dane was trying not to freak out. He hadn't been like this with anyone for a long time. He used to be the type of person that didn't care about personal boundaries. The person that would grab someone's hand just for the fun of it, or cuddle with on the couch because there was a movie playing and honestly...who didn't love a good cuddle while watching a movie. Granted, it was almost always with a girl and not a guy... but Dane didn't care. He wasn't... he didn't swing that way or anything. It was just nice, to just sit here and be close to someone.
The wings around him threw him off a bit. He obviously hadn't cuddled with someone that had wings before. He thought it felt... nice though. Gave a bit more security. Like whatever happened... Mori might actually be there no matter what. But... maybe it didn't work like that. "Why are our conversations always so morbid." Dane said, smiling slightly and letting a small chuckle come out of his mouth. It felt odd... but he wanted to break out of his hard shell. He wanted to do something. He wanted to be the person he was before. The person he was before couldn't stop laughing.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 22, 2012 1:13:06 GMT -5
It was true, their conversations tended toward the morose. Perhaps it was because these were the things that needed talking about, or maybe Mori should start steering their talks in a more positive direction. He finally looked down at Dane. The man looked relatively comfortable. That was good, it meant Mori wasn't overstepping his bounds. "Probably because you're crazy and most of the people I know are dead," he answered, an easy deadpan. His intention wasn't clear until his serious expression broke in to a goofy grin. They had to laugh at it, or they'd end up hidden away somewhere.
"But I actually do have something more upbeat to talk to you about," he said, straightening up a bit. His expression became brighter than usual, almost joyful. "I got a call last night. My daughter, Angela, is coming to stay here. I never know how long, but hopefully she'll hang around for a decent length this time. She has a bit of a wandering spirit." The thought of Angela coming made his chest swell. She was his joy, the angel's own little angel.
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 22, 2012 13:02:23 GMT -5
Dane snapped his head to look at Mori when he heard what he said. He was crazy? Of course he knew that, but he hadn't expected Moriel to say it. His face relaxed a bit when he saw the goofy yet somehow adorable smile on his face. He smiled back. Just a joke... he had to remind himself of that. He knew he was crazy. No sane person would wake up in the middle of the night screaming his lungs off because of a bad dream. A sane person wouldn't be afraid of every little sound and movement he heard and saw. A sane person was the opposite of what Dane was.
Mori's daughter? That would be interesting. "I'm not like...imposing? I don't want to like... ruin family time or whatever." Dane muttered. He felt awkward being here. He really did. He liked it, don't get him wrong, but he still felt awkward. "I'll just stay in my room more or something." All mirth that had just been in his face not that long before had gone. If his daughter was coming, he would probably want time alone with her. Dane was fine with that, he just didn't want to interfere.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 22, 2012 13:13:55 GMT -5
His smile disappeared at Dane's reaction. Moriel had been so excited about Angela coming home that he hadn't even anticipated it might alienate his guest. "No, no, no," he insisted quickly. "Don't worry about anything like that. She'll be happy to meet you. You'll like her, everyone does." And he might have worried about introducing them - that things might complicate further - but he knew Angela's preferences were strongly in favor of females.
Mori tried to think of a way to reassure Dane. "Angela probably won't be around too much anyway. For dinner, sometimes, but mostly she likes to be out and about. I can't come close to keeping up with her. If anything, she'll try to get you to go out climbing trees with her or whatever her whim of the day is." He laughed at the thought of this serious soldier attempting to join in on his daughter's childish antics. "In any case, you have no reason to keep out of the way. Trust me, you'll understand once you meet her."
Maybe with her around, though, there would be enough distraction to keep his thoughts from straying, though. It had been a long time since his emotions had betrayed him in such a way.
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 22, 2012 13:33:07 GMT -5
Dane wanted to believe him, but there was a little voice in the back of his head that told him Mori could be lying. What father wouldn't want to spend alone time with his daughter. Especially a father that would outlive said daughter. Dane wasn't sure how Mori could handle that... but it was something he was used to after all. Dane didn't think he could handle outliving his children. Should he ever decide to have them, that is. Should Dane just... let it go? Should he...just ignore the feeling he had in the pit of his stomach. He felt bad. He didn't like using someone hospitality like he was Mori.
"Okay... if you say so. I'll just... I'll probably stay in my room more." Dane said in barely a whisper voice. He would give them space. If he knew she wasn't here, then maybe he would venture out, but otherwise he would stay in the room Mori was being nice enough to give to him, and he wouldn't say anything else. "And climbing trees are fun you know. You should give it a try." Dane tried to joke with Mori, a light smile on his face as he leaned his head down on Mori's shoulder, glancing upward at the angel he owed so much to.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 22, 2012 16:11:53 GMT -5
It seemed his words weren't getting through. The angel sighed and he nudged Dane's arm with the edge of his wing. "I'll be rather disappointed if you do," he told him. Mori ignored the man's attempts at changing the subject. "I like having you around, Dane. You're a good tenant and a good friend. I don't intend to chase you into hiding." Mori's hand caught him by the chin, turned his face up to look at his own. His jaw was clenched, expression stern, daring the mortal to argue with him.
Moriel caught himself staring perhaps a bit too long, caught by not just the pain in Dane's eyes, but the intensity as well. They had a depth to them that most mortals lacked. He swallowed hard and looked away. "In any case, having you around might make her energy a bit less overwhelming. The last time she was here, she spent two weeks redecorating the entire lighthouse. It was amusing, but incredibly exhausting. She's responsible for the feminine wallpaper in your bathroom, by the way."
He had suggested something a bit more universally appealing, but she had insisted that she and Christopher were the only ones that would ever use it, and Chris could deal. So now there was a strange textured rose-colored wallpaper and flowers painted around the mirror. "Pink is soothing," she had insisted. "Prisons use it to decrease aggression among inmates, you know."
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 22, 2012 16:26:45 GMT -5
Dane's eyes glanced at the wing that had nudged him. Okay... so maybe Moriel meant what he said, but it didn't change the fact that he still felt like Mori should have time alone with his daughter. He was about to say so when a hand caught his chin and looked at him with a serious expression that showed just about how serious Mori really was. He couldn't bring himself to say anything. He looked into his eyes just like Moriel was looking into his. Now he knew for sure that this wasn't a normal thing to do with someone. "Okay. I won't hide in my room." Dane whispered when Moriel broke the eye contact that Dane couldn't seem to break.
He rested his head back down and squeezed Mori's middle to show he was sorry, he hoped Moriel knew what that meant. "And I like the girly wallpaper. Pink is the new black, you know." Dane joked and hid his smile as he buried his head into Moriel's. It didn't even register that it was something the old Dane would have said and definitely not something the new Dane would have even thought of.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 22, 2012 20:09:55 GMT -5
Satisfied with their hesitant agreement, Mori smiled and nodded in acceptance. "Good. Angela should hate for us to see less of you on her account." And, on a more selfish note, he would hate for the happiness of seeing his daughter to be dampened by guilt and disappointment over Dane's secluding himself.
Increasingly aware of how intimate their positions had become, the angel straightened up a bit and pulled his wing back so it wasn't...cradling him so much. Mori laughed at the joke, relieved that things had seemed to come up from their dark topic. "Well, I'll take that into consideration the next time she tries to remodel," he replied. "Suffice it to say I'm not exactly up on the latest fashions. If it hadn't been for my wife Emma, there wouldn't even be electricity in this place."
He reached over and picked up the book in Dane's lap and turned it over in his hands, distracting himself. He flipped open the front cover and, sure enough, there on the inside cover was "Carol S." written in careful, round script. "It's strange having daughters," he mused. "With boys, it's just like molding smaller versions of yourself, with modifications, of course. You expect them to take care of themselves and there's respect and affection, but it's balanced. With girls, though, there's this strong protective instinct that comes over you. And at the same time, they manage to wrap you around their fingers from the second. You're not sure who's taking care of whom."
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 22, 2012 21:06:28 GMT -5
Dane could live with that. He wouldn't seclude himself... He hoped he would like Mori's daughter, but if she was anything like he was saying, then he was sure he would. There wouldn't be a reason to not like her, right? That's what Dane thought at least. He moved a bit when Mori moved and pulled his wing back. He tried not to think about the fact that he felt... emptier than he had before. He didn't know if he should feel like that. No. He definitely shouldn't. That was bad. Wrong. Not right. He coughed awkwardly, but didn't move very much. He didn't want to. He was comfortable.
Dane snorted at Moriel. No electricity? Dane didn't think he would be able to survive without electricity. He liked his phone, granted he didn't really have anyone to talk to with said phone... but that didn't stop him from loving the music he put on it. It gave him an escape. "I've never really thought about what it would be like to have a child... it's kind of... unreal to me. And I was kind of forced to grow up... I was a kid when I went into the war. And there isn't exactly time for me to think about children.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 23, 2012 0:29:32 GMT -5
Moriel lifted his eyebrows, considering Dane's reasoning. It was true, boys became men very quickly in battle. He'd seen it in his own sons when they had gone to war. His firstborn, Mishal, had been just sixteen when the Ottoman Civil War took him. Then again, his concept of childhood had been abstract at best with his first children. "Imagine how I felt," he said with a laugh. "I have quite literally never been a child. I came into creation fully conceived and matured. I fear I must have screwed the first few batches up quite spectacularly."
He studied the nephilim beside him, trying to imagine what he'd been like before the war. All he had were secondhand accounts that he only vaguely remembered. "From what Mary told me, before you enlisted, you were a very positive child, though. It's unfortunate how quickly things can change." Perhaps someday Dane would become that happy person once again. More than likely, though, he would heal but never be the same. He may become wiser or maybe just bitter, but the chances of this torment leaving him untouched...well, he wasn't about to delude himself.
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 23, 2012 0:44:08 GMT -5
Dane hadn't thought about the fact that Mori hadn't actually been a child. He felt bad for saying what he did now... he hadn't meant to make him feel uncomfortable or whatever he was now. He hadn't actually thought about it when he said that. "I'm sorry... I hadn't meant to..." Dane started but didn't know how he could finish that. He just... he hadn't meant to... he felt exceedingly awkward.
He took a deep breath and just let Mori talk more. He mentioned him before the war. Dane had small memories of what he was like before the war had started for him, but he didn't really know what he was like. Or maybe he did and he was trying to repress whatever he was like before. "I was... yeah. I guess I was positive. I was... I liked making jokes. I liked seeing people around me happy and laughing, so I would make jokes." Dane told him with his eye brows burrowed. He couldn't imagine that now. Couldn't imagine anything other than this hard shell he had created from the effect of war. He was hiding from people... hiding from happiness. Hiding from anything that wasn't misery.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 23, 2012 1:19:19 GMT -5
Moriel shook his head and held up a hand to silence his apologies. "It's no hardship for me, don't worry. My kind simply don't have them, that's all. We weren't made for it. Even if I had, it would be so long ago and so alien that it would be irrelevant to child rearing," he explained, voice slipping into the scientific analysis it took on at times. "I imagine that raising a child in heaven would be...well, I doubt there would be any raising necessary, to be quite honest. Other angels are of higher rankings than others, and in that way it's like older siblings to the younger, but other than that, there's really no comparison." He shrugged. "In any case, it was interesting getting to figure out how the whole system worked."
He knew the clinical nature of his approach was strange, but it was how he approached most things. In any case, he turned his attention to Dane again. "That sounds like Angela," he told him. "She just wants everyone to be happy. I think it's a good quality, but...well, changing isn't always bad. Just because you were good before doesn't mean you won't be if you change."
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Post by dane brock evans on Dec 23, 2012 1:36:30 GMT -5
Heaven... Dane had thought about Heaven quite often actually. It fascinated him. Made him wonder if he got the bad end of the situation he went through in the war. He closed his eyes and tried not to think about it... he didn't want to upset Mori with the thoughts that had occurred to him several times since what happened. Then he thought about who he was talking to. Mori was helping him... Mori was there for him. He opened his eyes and looked at Mori. "What's Heaven like... it's just well. I've thought about it... And how... in the end... it would have been better if I had died with the people I was with." Dane knew he shouldn't think about that... but he did. He did almost every night.
Angela sounded better and better as Mori kept mentioning her. Maybe if Dane saw how she acted, he would end up adapting and turning back into who he used to be. It was a long shot, but worth the thought. He'd make sure to at least give her a try when she got here. "Sometimes changing can be horrible though." Dane told Moriel, he truly believed that as well.
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Moriel Sarid
Fallen
[*]Level 25 [*]Psionic Blast [*]Lighthouse Keeper in Carford
[SKB:]
Posts: 119
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Post by Moriel Sarid on Dec 23, 2012 1:44:23 GMT -5
The question was a common one, but the reasoning behind it made Moriel's stomach clench in concern. It showed on his face, true pain. "It's...not something I can accurately describe. And I honestly don't know what happens to mortals that go there. Only angels of death are allowed that information. I was appointed to watch over the living." He sighed heavily, trying to think of something to say to convince Dane that it was better he lived, that this was preferable. But, for Dane himself, the pain may actually have been less.
"Even if there's pain...even if there's a lot of it...every good thing that happens to you from now on, you can think to yourself, 'I might have missed out on that.'" He was surprised by his own words, and then thought back to Angela's brightness, Christopher's warmth. Mary might be at peace in heaven, but she had missed out on some beautiful moments with her children. "Someday you'll find someone you love. Maybe you'll have children. Maybe you'll create something amazing. And you can think to yourself, 'What if I had never been able to do this?'"
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